Communication is more than just talking

Yep.  You heard it here first!  Just opening your mouth and blabbering does not necessarily count as communication. 

Here are a few nuggets of info:

Communication is vital to any relationship. 

Communication takes a relationship to the next level.

Communication can ward off arguments.

Communication can solve problems.

 

So why is it so hard to communicate sometimes?  It's the words right?  You don't want to just blurt out the first thing that comes to your mind when you are frustrated.  You also don't want to offend or come across as pushy or needy.  So what to do?

I like to write it down first.  Get my thoughts in order.  Then I try to think — if someone wanted to approach me with this same situation — what would work best with me?  And I try that.  

 

Just know…people are not mind readers by nature.  So if you don't share and communicate the good AND the bad — you don't move forward.

 

Got it?  Any questions?  Seriously.  Practice communicating! 

Hoodwinked and the High Road

Oh, it has happened to me again!  Hoodwinked!  As my first PR firm spiraled to bankruptcy without telling me I thought it was the end.  Then I spoke with a wonderful woman from NYC that gave me the names of three great PR firms.  Of course, as great as they were, they were all booked for quite some time.  But my antsy little self wanted something ASAP — so I went googling…my first mistake.  I came upon a PR firm in LA that looked great on the internet.  I tried to find something bad about them and couldn't (little did I know about a firm called reputation defender that this man has most likely hired!) Now as I talked to him, everything sounded great!  He was telling me what I knew was true.  It is who you know.  It is the PR firms connections that get you in the door.  He told me how he might have to barter one of his celebrity clients in order to get me on a great morning drive radio show.  We talked for quite sometime and I thought — wow!  This guy is great.  So off went my check.

Now, this is where the hook winking begins!  This man is a master at cleverly doctored words and phrases.  I suspect he holds a PhD in SPIN!  Before I know it, the success of my campaign was dependent on me writing my entire pitch.  Ask ANY reputable PR firm and see if that is what you are supposed to do.  My two girlfriends that worked for top PR firms in NYC took one look at his emails to me and screamed FRAUD! He also claimed he couldn't tell me who he was pitching my book to?  It was a secret because he has such exclusive connections.  Really?  Ask any reputable PR firm if they will tell you who they pitched your stuff to.  They do!  Why?  Why else would you pay them?!?!  They told me it was extra work and would cost much more.  Hmmmm, I don't know about you, but I keep record of everyone I talk or  pitch my book to.  Or else, how would I know who I have pitched it to?!?

So, I questioned him.  You could tell by his words and his tone, he didn't like being questioned.  Again, got some very cleverly doctored paragraphs directing everything back to me and my "amateur" self.   So I thought about blasting an email off to him telling him what I thought, how I felt hoodwinked and telling him to just cancel my campaign.  But then I thought again.  If this guy is this sneaky and devious…what might he do to me?  Plus, he already had my check.  So I let it go.  

As for the high road.  I'm letting karma take care of this snake.  Now, with me writing this little blurb…it is a bit low road of me…although I'm not mentioning any names as his reputation defender would just come on in and snatch it away. But here is a hint.  If you find a PR firm that claims big celebrity and high profile clients, but doesn't list any of its clients, it is probably because they don't have any.  Or the ones they did have wouldn't recommend him. 

What did he do for me?  Well, I give him this — he made me realize that it is only me that is going to work the hardest for me.  So that is what I am doing now.  Working hard for me.  And I just might call up one of those wonderful REPUTABLE PR firms recommended by the wonderful woman in NYC and wait until they have time for me.  Which is what I should have done in the first place!